Chapter 8: I have a feeling
I had a feeling you were going to say that.
I have feeling. The dissemination of systematizing the sordid path of inquiry into the nature of existence.
This precipice of understanding by breaking things apart and looking at the pieces. We call it analysis,
what you attempt to convey is self analysis. Someone once told me we could break the human being into
certain facets but only for understanding sake. The physical body, the emotional body, the mental body,
the causal body, the unconscious, the subconscious, the conscious, the collective conscious, the cosmic
body, all the ephemeral bodies, …..Motivating forces, desire, etcetera.
(The body, what a good machine/vehicle) capable of functioning so streamline under the proper
conditions, able to perform an assortment of tasks. Built to last, self-regenerative, beautiful design, buy one
now while supplies last. )
Okay back on track, which track was that? I start from where I am at, and decide as to where I am going.
You need a system. A set off regulations that govern your life to your own principles. The question is
where do these principles come from and who is to say they are right. Even if I cannot pursue Universal
truth, if I can have faith in my own truths, I can move with confidence knowing I am living up to my own
best personal standards, which will fulfill what exactly? The possibility in the validation of the course of my
life and the actions I take and the reason or meaning behind my modus operandi.
What motivates me is easy, Truth. I am a seeker of sorts, the kind that sorts through this mess of a life,
trying to make sense of it. And what happens once it makes sense? Then I won’t have to worry. Why
do you worry in the first place? Because I fear the salvation of my soul. Most people do not fear their
shadows, it is their infinite light that they are afraid to accept and become. My spirit is not in accordance
with where it should be. What are the rules of truth? Are there laws governing truth or is the truth I seek
laws to abide by. Rules, procedures, methods. The procedure of living one’s life. I lost the guidebook,
and now have to navigate through the treacherous waters of false prophets, -believers, scoffers, and my
own hopes and fears, before I can rest, non= Rules imply a system, a system implies induction of
knowledge, knowledge is governed by information, information is.. . . . . .
This completely contradicts the notion of predeterminism, and fate, or destiny. If everything happens for a
reason, let’s say, Causality. That’s fine, for every little action there’s a reaction. That does not
nullify the fact that some decisions are better then others. But to determine this one has to understand the
presence of free will. So in a deterministic setting all of this is preplanned in some fashion therefore none of
my actions are a surprise to god. Therefore if I felt this way, I could do anything and think it was already
preplanned in some way. This idea kills choice, by relinquishing choice. But one can choose, which is a
choice, not to choose, but to live that way is very difficult but liberating. I give up all my choices, and let
the world choose. Surrender. Acceptance. What feelings do you go off of if you surrender your will to the
universe? Atheistic apathy. You learn to move with the Tao and just accept what is. It is the desireless yes
to the present moment. Perhaps. I still don’t know how I feel about this. Quit trying to control
everything. Someone once said, "You are not the doer." God takes care of all, that force which has made
you has set up all the things in your life, it is up to you to have patience to allow those things to unfold.
However I still feel a sense to 'do' things, but it implies that all things are done through the creator and
through his mercy.
I had a feeling you were going to say that.
I have feeling. The dissemination of systematizing the sordid path of inquiry into the nature of existence.
This precipice of understanding by breaking things apart and looking at the pieces. We call it analysis,
what you attempt to convey is self analysis. Someone once told me we could break the human being into
certain facets but only for understanding sake. The physical body, the emotional body, the mental body,
the causal body, the unconscious, the subconscious, the conscious, the collective conscious, the cosmic
body, all the ephemeral bodies, …..Motivating forces, desire, etcetera.
(The body, what a good machine/vehicle) capable of functioning so streamline under the proper
conditions, able to perform an assortment of tasks. Built to last, self-regenerative, beautiful design, buy one
now while supplies last. )
Okay back on track, which track was that? I start from where I am at, and decide as to where I am going.
You need a system. A set off regulations that govern your life to your own principles. The question is
where do these principles come from and who is to say they are right. Even if I cannot pursue Universal
truth, if I can have faith in my own truths, I can move with confidence knowing I am living up to my own
best personal standards, which will fulfill what exactly? The possibility in the validation of the course of my
life and the actions I take and the reason or meaning behind my modus operandi.
What motivates me is easy, Truth. I am a seeker of sorts, the kind that sorts through this mess of a life,
trying to make sense of it. And what happens once it makes sense? Then I won’t have to worry. Why
do you worry in the first place? Because I fear the salvation of my soul. Most people do not fear their
shadows, it is their infinite light that they are afraid to accept and become. My spirit is not in accordance
with where it should be. What are the rules of truth? Are there laws governing truth or is the truth I seek
laws to abide by. Rules, procedures, methods. The procedure of living one’s life. I lost the guidebook,
and now have to navigate through the treacherous waters of false prophets, -believers, scoffers, and my
own hopes and fears, before I can rest, non= Rules imply a system, a system implies induction of
knowledge, knowledge is governed by information, information is.. . . . . .
This completely contradicts the notion of predeterminism, and fate, or destiny. If everything happens for a
reason, let’s say, Causality. That’s fine, for every little action there’s a reaction. That does not
nullify the fact that some decisions are better then others. But to determine this one has to understand the
presence of free will. So in a deterministic setting all of this is preplanned in some fashion therefore none of
my actions are a surprise to god. Therefore if I felt this way, I could do anything and think it was already
preplanned in some way. This idea kills choice, by relinquishing choice. But one can choose, which is a
choice, not to choose, but to live that way is very difficult but liberating. I give up all my choices, and let
the world choose. Surrender. Acceptance. What feelings do you go off of if you surrender your will to the
universe? Atheistic apathy. You learn to move with the Tao and just accept what is. It is the desireless yes
to the present moment. Perhaps. I still don’t know how I feel about this. Quit trying to control
everything. Someone once said, "You are not the doer." God takes care of all, that force which has made
you has set up all the things in your life, it is up to you to have patience to allow those things to unfold.
However I still feel a sense to 'do' things, but it implies that all things are done through the creator and
through his mercy.
